posted October 27, 2000 06:31 AM               

...you tell family and friends that your children LOVE Star Wars, even though they really dont, just so you get to play with the toys.

...you find yourself discussing characters from the books and movies as if they were actually old friends of yours.

...you dont need the subtitles when an alien speaks in one of the movies.

...you have a pet named after one of the characters

...you have a CHILD named after one of the characters.

...you find yourself debating with others what is real and not real in the completely fictional SW universe.

...you truly believe that you are strong in the Force.

...Yoda and Ben appear to you in dreams, and you take their advice on a regular basis.

...in your nice, neat, alphabetically arranged bookshelves, all of your Star Wars books are grouped together, and sorted by chronological order.

...you've ever considered a pilgrimage to drive by George Lucas' house.

...you actually know, by heart, the rules to the Star Wars drinking game, and have played in more than twice.

...you bring up scenes from Star Wars books and movies when trying to explain everyday situations.

...upon hearing the news of Billy Dee Williams' arrest, your first thought was That no good Lando!

...a Star Wars .WAV file is your Windows Opening sound effect.

...you are constantly getting into debates about the canon-ness of things.

...you truly believe, after 13 years, that new movies are being released any day now.

...your checks have SW characters on them.

...you used to laugh at people who purchased things off of the QVC network, until you discovered you couldnt live without the Luke and Leia potholders.

...you think Mark Hamill is underrated as an actor.

....you see presciption bottles, syrup bottles or other household items appear as SW characters.

....you have copied the movies on to casette tapes to listen to as you drive.

...you bought a white Isuzu Trooper, strictly because of the name.

CLASSIC: You Might Be A Jedi Redneck If:
(1) Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
(2) You have ever used your lightsaber to open a bottle of Jack Daniel's.
(3) You think the best use of your lightsaber is picking your teeth.
(4) At least one wing of your X-Wing is Bondo colored.
(5) There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
(6) You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
(7) You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok... without using the word "chicken".
(8) You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
(9) You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
(10) You ever lost a hand during a light-saber fight because you had to spit.
(11)The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the "dadgum skeeters".
(12) Wookies are offended by your B.O.
(13) You have ever used the force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.
(14) You have ever used The Force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.
(15) You have ever used a lightsaber to clean fish or open a non-twist-off bottle of beer.
(16) Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over t' the Dark Side... It'll be a hoot."
(17) You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the bar-b-q grill to light.
(18) The moonshine still you built on Endor is hidden so well even the Ewoks can't find it.
(19) You have a stuffed womp rat anywhere in your home.
(20) More than half the droids you own don't function.
(21) The number of blasters you own exceeds your I.Q.
(22) You wonder why Luke and Leia gave up on getting married.
(23) You used a carbon-freezing chamber to mount the Wampa you shot while on vacation on Hoth.
(24) Your moonshine is made on a real moon.
(25) You don't like wearing a Jedi robe because it prevents access to the dip stored in your back pocket.
(26) Sandpeople back down from your mama.
(27) You've ever used Jedi mind control to talk your way out of a speeding ticket or DUI.
(28) You've ever strangled someone with The Force because they laughed at your accent.
(29) You've ever argued with a Jawa over scavenging rights to a broken droid.
(30) A Wookie has ever told you that you need to shave.
(31) You have ever wrecked a landspeeder while trying to light a cigarette with your lightsaber.
(32) You don't think the Ewoks are primitive, but a highly intellectual race.
(33) You think an AT-AT looks like a giant cow from back home.
(34) You think that Stormtroopers are just KKK members with really good sheets.
(35) You don't think Jabba's pig guards have a hygiene problem.
(36) The Rancor monster refused to eat you.

That stuff actually started bringing back old memories of chatting in the Star Wars Triva Chatroom and RPG plus a lot of stuff I did before finding the Vast Empire